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  • Re: Tell us a joke

    Originally posted by Donald the Great View Post
    I havent talked to my wife in three weeks.

    why.

    I didnt want to interrupt here.
    Classic x
    Always ready for chat.

    Comment


    • Re: Tell us a joke

      Originally posted by George 1978 View Post
      I would suggest a spellchecker.
      Yeah guilty as charged, not a word i use regularly
      Ejector seat?...your jokin!

      Comment


      • Re: Tell us a joke

        Originally posted by tex View Post
        Yeah guilty as charged, not a word i use regularly
        Actually, I thought that an elephant with a spellchecker was funny enough to be a joke in itself!
        I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
        There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
        I'm having so much fun
        My lucky number's one
        Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

        Comment


        • Re: Tell us a joke

          What do you call a group of people who are celebrating someone about to give birth?

          A labour party.
          I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
          There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
          I'm having so much fun
          My lucky number's one
          Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

          Comment


          • Re: Tell us a joke

            I was just thinking how ironic it would have been if the film Half a Sixpence had been made in 3D.

            If you don't get it, you're too young.
            I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
            There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
            I'm having so much fun
            My lucky number's one
            Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

            Comment


            • Re: Tell us a joke

              From the Fringe a coupla years ago...

              My wife says I'm unromantic. She asked me what my favourite flower was and I said "Dunno, self-raising?"
              Time flies like the wind, fruit flies like bananas - go figure!

              Comment


              • Re: Tell us a joke

                Originally posted by George 1978 View Post
                I was just thinking how ironic it would have been if the film Half a Sixpence had been made in 3D.

                If you don't get it, you're too young.
                Threepence (threepenny bit)
                Ejector seat?...your jokin!

                Comment


                • Re: Tell us a joke

                  Originally posted by zabadak View Post
                  From the Fringe a coupla years ago...

                  My wife says I'm unromantic. She asked me what my favourite flower was and I said "Dunno, self-raising?"
                  Used this one in my father of the bride speech, the silence was deafening
                  Ejector seat?...your jokin!

                  Comment


                  • Re: Tell us a joke

                    Originally posted by tex View Post
                    Threepence (threepenny bit)
                    Correct - even I was born 7 1/2 years after we went decimal, and so to my age group the joke still would have been a bit cryptic.
                    I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
                    There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
                    I'm having so much fun
                    My lucky number's one
                    Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

                    Comment


                    • Re: Tell us a joke

                      Originally posted by George 1978 View Post
                      Correct - even I was born 7 1/2 years after we went decimal, and so to my age group the joke still would have been a bit cryptic.
                      pre decimal coins were..

                      halfpenny
                      penny
                      threepence
                      sixpence (tanner)
                      shilling (a bob)
                      half a crown
                      ten bob note
                      quid note, fiver,tenner, twenty,fifty.

                      Not sure where a farthing was in this list
                      Ejector seat?...your jokin!

                      Comment


                      • Re: Tell us a joke

                        Originally posted by George 1978 View Post
                        I was just thinking how ironic it would have been if the film Half a Sixpence had been made in 3D.

                        If you don't get it, you're too young.
                        I don't get it.
                        Always ready for chat.

                        Comment


                        • Re: Tell us a joke

                          Originally posted by Caitlyn View Post
                          I don't get it.
                          A sixpence = 6d
                          Half a sixpence =3d

                          http://www.historyhome.co.uk/peel/economic/currency.htm

                          Now do you get it?
                          I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
                          There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
                          I'm having so much fun
                          My lucky number's one
                          Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

                          Comment


                          • Re: Tell us a joke

                            Speaking of pre-decimal currency:

                            What do call a man with a shilling on his head?
                            Bob.
                            I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
                            There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
                            I'm having so much fun
                            My lucky number's one
                            Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

                            Comment


                            • Re: Tell us a joke

                              Originally posted by tex View Post
                              pre decimal coins were..

                              halfpenny
                              penny
                              threepence
                              sixpence (tanner)
                              shilling (a bob)
                              half a crown
                              ten bob note
                              quid note, fiver,tenner, twenty,fifty.

                              Not sure where a farthing was in this list
                              Also Farthing (quarter of a penny) and Crown (5 shillings)
                              Time flies like the wind, fruit flies like bananas - go figure!

                              Comment


                              • Re: Tell us a joke

                                I always think that a half crown was to the pound is what a furlong was to a mile, in other words, one eighth.

                                And a Guinea was a pound and one shilling or (or a pound and 5p)? Was the Guinea a different currency to the pound I wonder? Pound Puppies versus Guinea Pigs?

                                960 farthings in a pound - a bit like the number of pennies in £10 now.
                                I've everything I need to keep me satisfied
                                There's nothing you can do to make me change my mind
                                I'm having so much fun
                                My lucky number's one
                                Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh!

                                Comment

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