Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

[Dai Lowe]

Hi there from a new boy


I have a memory of an ad ~ but for which coffee? ~ in which a young man stares into his belovéd's eyes, after what must have been a romantic dinner. She has served him coffee and he, in his thoughts, recites a verse in praise of her. All I remember is the final two lines…

Your eyes are filled with passion torrid … [takes sip of coffee]
Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Has anyone idea whose coffee and what year? 70's or 80's?

Better still, the rest of the verse?


Or did I dream the whole thing?


I'm trying to build up a collection of texts on love and coffee for the booklet associated with this project :~
www.lucidity.ltd.uk/coffee

[Derekflint]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

I've got an old coffee ad (poster or newspaper) saved somewhere - I'll put it on here later when I've located it.

Try hitting up archive.org (I think that's it) they have loads of old Folger's ads on there.

[Dai Lowe]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Thanks. I'll try, but it was very much an English ad, with a Northern accent, I think, so Kenco, Nestlé or Maxwell House are most likely. Or Birds.

Don't think we ever got Folgers here.

[Teejay]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Or did I dream the whole thing?

I think you probably did Dai. Too much caffeine plays games with the mind.

Pass the Red Bull....

[Derekflint]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Am trying YouTube - just seen a bit of Ricardo Montalban advertising Maxwell House.

Khhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnn!

[Teejay]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

LOL @ Flinty! I'm going to make sure I never "store-test for fresher coffee," that poster looks like fun!!

[Derekflint]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

YouTube - Mellow Birds Advert - Joanna Lumley

To alleviate disappointment - here's Joanna Lumley heaping praise on Mellow Birds, just like you have to heap Mellow Birds into a cup to make a decent cuppa joe!

[Teejay]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

YouTube - Mellow Birds Advert - Joanna Lumley

To alleviate disappointment - here's Joanna Lumley heaping praise on Mellow Birds, just like you have to heap Mellow Birds into a cup to make a decent cuppa joe!

I just empty the kettle straight into the jar. Saves time...

[Derekflint]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

YouTube - Ricardo Montalban Maxwell House Coffee Commercial

How remiss of me to not put the link to Mr Montalban.

Control yourselves ladies - the plane for Fantasy Island departs in a few moments. Cabin crews, expect a run on the coffee.

[Dai Lowe]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

I like my coffee as I like my women ~ strong and bitter.

Someone elsewhere has a vague memory it might have been part of the Mellow Birds campaign to suggest other coffees were horrid as in bitter. Like selling warm ice cream on the grounds the usual stuff is too cold!

[Derekflint]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Like Eddie Izzard once said:

'I like my women like I like my coffee - in a plastic cup.'

Mellow Birds - because tea bags are too much hassle.

YouTube - mellow birds advert

[Teejay]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Like Eddie Izzard once said:

'I like my women like I like my coffee - in a plastic cup.'

Mellow Birds - because tea bags are too much hassle.

YouTube - mellow birds advert

I like my men like I like my coffee. Sweet, rich and quite thick. Oh, and with nuts...

PG Tips - Cos I like the munkys!! LOL!

Gratuitous monkey pic attached >

[Derekflint]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

But you only get an 'Oo' with Typhoo.
Or a punch in the stomach.


Have drawn a complete blank on this ad - it sounds like the kind of tripe that Maxwell House or Mellow Birds would come up with, but I did find a Kenco ad with Steptoe and Son earlier. Whilst it wasn't the ad in question, the rhyme would sound just perfect coming from Harry H Corbett so perhaps they did another one?

[Dai Lowe]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

Maybe but it definitely wasn't Corbett, or anyone really famous as far as I recall. I too found the Steptoe one. How the mighty can fall, eh?

[Teejay]

Re: Stone the crows, your coffee's horrid!

But you only get an 'Oo' with Typhoo.
Or a punch in the stomach.


Have drawn a complete blank on this ad - it sounds like the kind of tripe that Maxwell House or Mellow Birds would come up with, but I did find a Kenco ad with Steptoe and Son earlier. Whilst it wasn't the ad in question, the rhyme would sound just perfect coming from Harry H Corbett so perhaps they did another one?

That's true. I forgot about the 'Oo'. Did you see the Only Fools and Horses (my FAVE!!) where Del, Rodney and Grandad went fishing to a little cottage. The weather was awful and Del said "It's blowin' a ruddy typhoid out there" Rodney went "Typhoon" And Del said "Yeah ok if you're putting the kettle on" PMSL!