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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Originally posted by Cartimand View Post
    Click image for larger version

Name:	ape.JPG
Views:	45
Size:	55.2 KB
ID:	286598

    Ape: "Go on - do that famous yell of yours."
    Charlton Heston: "For the last friggin' time I am NOT Tarzan!"


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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Originally posted by Cartimand View Post
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Name:	ape.JPG
Views:	45
Size:	55.2 KB
ID:	286598

    Ape 1: Here, you'll like this one. Why did the human fall out of the tree?
    Ape2: I dunno.
    Ape 1: 'Cos it was dead. Haw, haw, haw!
    Charlton Heston: Please just kill me now.


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  • Semi42
    replied
    Charlton Heston. “Why have you gibbon me this to wear?”
    Urko “ it’s an Ape-ron”

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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Originally posted by Cartimand View Post
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Name:	ape.JPG
Views:	45
Size:	55.2 KB
ID:	286598

    Ape1: So I was down the Monkey Bar last night and the waitress screamed "Does anyone know CPR?"
    Ape2: What happened?
    Ape1: I said I know C, P, R and most of the rest of the alphabet too - and everyone laughed, except for the poor chimp who choked to death on his banana!
    Charlton Heston: Groan... .


    PS. I reckon Catflap's witty suggestion above is the winner!

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  • catflap
    replied
    Hmm - I didn't think the NRA initiation ceremony would be like this?

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  • catflap
    replied
    Hope that's his rifle butt prodding me in the back...

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  • W1 Rover
    replied
    Most becoming sir, most becoming!
    Could I possibly interest you in one of our Maison Galen store cards?

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  • catflap
    replied
    Ape1: So what sort of suit was Sir looking for?
    Ape2: We have this rather sporty brown number here.... that is very Sir!
    Ape1: Have you ever monkeyed around sir?
    Ape2: Ooh! - suit you sir!
    Last edited by catflap; 3 weeks ago.

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  • Cartimand
    replied
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Name:	ape.JPG
Views:	45
Size:	55.2 KB
ID:	286598

    Pssst.... wanna make some money on the side?
    I know a couple of blokes called Patterson and Gimlin who would like to borrow your costume when we've finished filming for the day.



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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Click image for larger version

Name:	cyber.JPG
Views:	59
Size:	92.1 KB
ID:	286164

    I'm warning you human. If you don't wipe that smirk off your face, I'll show you what cyber-bullying really means.

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  • Moonraker
    replied
    Click image for larger version

Name:	image_6353.jpg
Views:	75
Size:	42.3 KB
ID:	285998Carter: You know guv, they say smoking is bad for you.
    Reagan: So is w------, but that hasn't stopped you.

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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Originally posted by Cartimand View Post
    Stan: "Well what d'yer reckon Bob - isn't it time we got on board with their double-deckers?"
    Bob: "Phwooaarr not 'arf! Bwa ha ha!"

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  • Semi42
    replied
    [ATTACH=CONFIG]n285905[/ATTACH]

    Stan: "They say one day these things will be all electric!"
    Clippie: "Gor! That’ll be sumfink!”
    Stan: "Na, it’ll never ‘appen, we ain’t never gonna get extension leads long enough !"
    Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"

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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Originally posted by Cartimand View Post
    Click image for larger version Name:	buses.JPG Views:	8 Size:	38.3 KB ID:	285905

    Stan: "Gor blimey what a day!"
    Clippie: "What's up Stan?"
    Stan: "First my mother-in-law gets hit by a bus and now Blakey says they might sack me because of it!"
    Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"
    Last edited by Cartimand; 17-08-2021, 10:25.

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  • Cartimand
    replied
    Originally posted by Cartimand View Post
    Click image for larger version

Name:	buses.JPG
Views:	103
Size:	38.3 KB
ID:	285905

    Clippie: "So why did you become a bus driver, Stan?"
    Stan: "To overcome my fear"
    Clippie: "You were scared of driving?"
    Stan: "No - of dying alone!"
    Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"

    Leave a comment:

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