Caption Contest

[Cartimand]

Ape 1: Here, you'll like this one. Why did the human fall out of the tree?
Ape2: I dunno.
Ape 1: 'Cos it was dead. Haw, haw, haw!
Charlton Heston: Please just kill me now.

[Semi42]

Charlton Heston. “Why have you gibbon me this to wear?”
Urko “ it’s an Ape-ron”

[Cartimand]

Ape1: So I was down the Monkey Bar last night and the waitress screamed "Does anyone know CPR?"
Ape2: What happened?
Ape1: I said I know C, P, R and most of the rest of the alphabet too - and everyone laughed, except for the poor chimp who choked to death on his banana!
Charlton Heston: Groan... .

PS. I reckon Catflap's witty suggestion above is the winner!

[catflap]

Hmm - I didn't think the NRA initiation ceremony would be like this?

[catflap]

Hope that's his rifle butt prodding me in the back...

[W1 Rover]

Most becoming sir, most becoming!
Could I possibly interest you in one of our Maison Galen store cards?

[catflap]

Ape1: So what sort of suit was Sir looking for?
Ape2: We have this rather sporty brown number here.... that is very Sir!
Ape1: Have you ever monkeyed around sir?
Ape2: Ooh! - suit you sir!

[Cartimand]

Pssst.... wanna make some money on the side?
I know a couple of blokes called Patterson and Gimlin who would like to borrow your costume when we've finished filming for the day.

[Cartimand]

I'm warning you human. If you don't wipe that smirk off your face, I'll show you what cyber-bullying really means.

[Moonraker]

Carter: You know guv, they say smoking is bad for you.
Reagan: So is w------, but that hasn't stopped you.

[Cartimand]

Stan: "Well what d'yer reckon Bob - isn't it time we got on board with their double-deckers?"
Bob: "Phwooaarr not 'arf! Bwa ha ha!"

[Semi42]

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Stan: "They say one day these things will be all electric!"
Clippie: "Gor! That’ll be sumfink!”
Stan: "Na, it’ll never ‘appen, we ain’t never gonna get extension leads long enough !"
Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"

[Cartimand]

Stan: "Gor blimey what a day!"
Clippie: "What's up Stan?"
Stan: "First my mother-in-law gets hit by a bus and now Blakey says they might sack me because of it!"
Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"

[Cartimand]

Clippie: "So why did you become a bus driver, Stan?"
Stan: "To overcome my fear"
Clippie: "You were scared of driving?"
Stan: "No - of dying alone!"
Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"

[Cartimand]

Stan: "Hey girls, I see you're wearing the new uniform with the quarantine skirts."
Clippie: "Why do you call them that Stan?"
Stan: "Cos we can't wait for them to be lifted."
Bob: "Bwa ha ha!"